Decisions, decisions

Yesterday I got the phone call I was both looking forward to and dreading for the longest time. Ethan's spot has come available at the daycare we've put him on the waiting list for. As soon as I got off the phone with the director, I immediately started crying. It's such an emotional step for me to take that I just don't know if I am ready to take so soon. First of all, I didn't expect it to be this early and thought I had more time. We had anticipated him getting in at 18 months which would be next summer. I was OK with that since I enjoy staying home with him. My decision to come back to work part-time was just to keep my mind fresh in what is going on in the industry. I've seen it happen too many times with moms that stay home until their children go to school and when they go back to work, they have to retrain themselves. I didn't want that to happen. Our major reason for wanting to put him in a daycare is for the social interaction and opportunity to learn more. Of course we all want to do what is best for E with putting our needs second. My selfish side is coming out in this decision and I need to step back and really think what is best for our family. I have been more than blessed to be able to have such a flexible job that has allowed me to work part-time and stay home with Ethan three days out of five. I have really enjoyed the past 9 months with E and I will always cherish it. It makes me sad to know I would have such limited time with him in the evenings also.

I did speak to my boss first thing this morning and he is offering to take me back full-time at the salary I was at before. He's even willing to allow me to come in from 9 to 3 so I can get though traffic to be able to pick up Ethan by 3:30 and have more time with him in the afternoons. I think I will like that for sure! That definitely helps us out seeing that if I wasn't able to get paid the same amount, it would not make it worthwhile to work and we wouldn't be able to afford it with the lifestyle that we enjoy. Chris and I have a lot to talk about and pray about. God placed this opportunity in our laps and is giving us all the tools to be able to make a decision, it's just a hard decision to make.